November 5, 2011. 3 days from now, exactly November 8, 2011 I will be turning 19 years old. A year older. *sigh* Is this what feels if you're near your twenty's? T_T
Honestly, I feel older...already. Quite upsetting, I want to stay YOUNG!!! I haven't got my first kiss yet. X_x Boo me! My younger brother, who's 4 years younger than me have already tried it. i might have gone through a few relationships but...I never took the chance. Was that my fault? I just thought that its something to be done with someone special. DANG!!! -___-"
Aah...by the way, a few days ago my dear CHINGU, "Ikyang" had a sleepover at our house for 3days. We were both broke so we had found some way to KILL SOME TIME. *evil smile* A trip to our fiesta carnival wasn't bad, and a horror movie, + a 24/7 internet surfing. I guess it was Ikyang who enjoyed much of the internet. KeKeKe. And yeah! while she was here, we had some...chitchat like the old times. LOL. It was kinda awkward though, talking about the past and some secrets. Ahahaha!!! AWKWARD!!!! I remember I made some thought about us, being...a bit different...NO! I mean a A LOT DIFFERENT than those who age among us. Well, I mean young people whose the same age as us, are you know, more liberated than how we are now. Like, they enjoy much being on the outside, party and everything, drinking, and being in relationships; while us? hmm...we prefer being SINGLE, which I and WE think is normal. We love spending time on the outside too, but not on everyday basis! If we had to spend time on the outside, we would want to spent it with our family or better, with the GROUP. Maybe, this is just how we really are. We're UNIQUE. Hahaha! We choose to be IN LOVE with ourselves, that's why we don't need any relationships form the opposite sex, and we just enjoy much each other's company than spending it on others.
And, Ikyang made a breakthrough question once again. Hahaha! Its been a long time since I last heard that question, and somewhat...I opened my heartshaped-box that I've hidden deep. Hahaha! Sorry. I just can't help but laugh, its not funny though, but I want to think it is. Cause everytime this issue is being dragged out, the tough shell that I difficulty put on everyday is easily broken and showing which is not supposed to be shown. Funny eh? I keep telling others, how to be themselves and not hide from their shells and not to put on a mask. Let the people see you, and let them accept for who you are. I guess, I ate my own words. Boo me. But I am better now, than before, I am slowly taking steps ahead. Weeeeee!!! Should I cheer for myself? Hahaha! To your question Kyang, may I rephrase it? LOL.
My answer: "Yes. I still do have feelings for him. Its still overwhelming that sometimes I think I am going to burst. But I am able to cope up, control it. And its something I have manage to do for years now. I do not know how to get rid of these feelings, pero cguro puhon, kung naa nay maabot nga makalupig niya, cguro. I might not have able to forget about him yet, but I have move on. Move on not in the sense that I have erased my feelings for him, but I am able to move away from his shadow and survive far from him. I just don't have any guts to hate him. Wala jud ko'y kusog mudumot niya. Hahaha!"
Hahahaha!!! How I love myself right now. I sooooooooooooooooo sound MATURE! <3
Honestly, I feel older...already. Quite upsetting, I want to stay YOUNG!!! I haven't got my first kiss yet. X_x Boo me! My younger brother, who's 4 years younger than me have already tried it. i might have gone through a few relationships but...I never took the chance. Was that my fault? I just thought that its something to be done with someone special. DANG!!! -___-"
Aah...by the way, a few days ago my dear CHINGU, "Ikyang" had a sleepover at our house for 3days. We were both broke so we had found some way to KILL SOME TIME. *evil smile* A trip to our fiesta carnival wasn't bad, and a horror movie, + a 24/7 internet surfing. I guess it was Ikyang who enjoyed much of the internet. KeKeKe. And yeah! while she was here, we had some...chitchat like the old times. LOL. It was kinda awkward though, talking about the past and some secrets. Ahahaha!!! AWKWARD!!!! I remember I made some thought about us, being...a bit different...NO! I mean a A LOT DIFFERENT than those who age among us. Well, I mean young people whose the same age as us, are you know, more liberated than how we are now. Like, they enjoy much being on the outside, party and everything, drinking, and being in relationships; while us? hmm...we prefer being SINGLE, which I and WE think is normal. We love spending time on the outside too, but not on everyday basis! If we had to spend time on the outside, we would want to spent it with our family or better, with the GROUP. Maybe, this is just how we really are. We're UNIQUE. Hahaha! We choose to be IN LOVE with ourselves, that's why we don't need any relationships form the opposite sex, and we just enjoy much each other's company than spending it on others.
And, Ikyang made a breakthrough question once again. Hahaha! Its been a long time since I last heard that question, and somewhat...I opened my heartshaped-box that I've hidden deep. Hahaha! Sorry. I just can't help but laugh, its not funny though, but I want to think it is. Cause everytime this issue is being dragged out, the tough shell that I difficulty put on everyday is easily broken and showing which is not supposed to be shown. Funny eh? I keep telling others, how to be themselves and not hide from their shells and not to put on a mask. Let the people see you, and let them accept for who you are. I guess, I ate my own words. Boo me. But I am better now, than before, I am slowly taking steps ahead. Weeeeee!!! Should I cheer for myself? Hahaha! To your question Kyang, may I rephrase it? LOL.
My answer: "Yes. I still do have feelings for him. Its still overwhelming that sometimes I think I am going to burst. But I am able to cope up, control it. And its something I have manage to do for years now. I do not know how to get rid of these feelings, pero cguro puhon, kung naa nay maabot nga makalupig niya, cguro. I might not have able to forget about him yet, but I have move on. Move on not in the sense that I have erased my feelings for him, but I am able to move away from his shadow and survive far from him. I just don't have any guts to hate him. Wala jud ko'y kusog mudumot niya. Hahaha!"
Hahahaha!!! How I love myself right now. I sooooooooooooooooo sound MATURE! <3
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